;noise floor

[l u a]

with inherited grace, she paced from hoof to hoof. little had survived the holocaust that had cost almost every race its life, but somehow, these thousands of years later, something had been passed down her bloodlines. her ancestors, warmbloods from the times of man, had been cleanly polished dressage horses. it could be only from them that she had learnt what she was doing now- a tightly packed trot, almost without forward motion. what man would have called a piaffe, a move that would have lost people sleep to train, surviving through inheritance, intelligence, or luck.

a thin layer of sweat covered her sweeping bay neck, a thin froth gathering round her mouth. she was, of course, nervous- not simply because she had only just left her mother herd, but because that herd had warned her of these places, and those who claimed their neutrality. it was a term used by the bi-polar, the neaurotic, those who weren't narcasisstic enough to be dark, nor thick headed enough to be light. she was playing with fire, she knew. and these places, well- they just begged for some dashing stallion to come along, steal her heart, only to show his true colours upon return to his land. she could have simply stayed with her mother herd, found love for foals born of incest. hell, everything was messed up as it was anyway, inbreeding was the least of all problems.

but she knew, somewhere, that she had to be here. that she had to face her nervous gut and bite the bullet, take the risk of a demonic master if she wished for the joy of birth, or the thrill of fights and risks taken on her behalf.

she couldn't, however, shake the perpetual feeling of nausea that haunted her.

[skiSSors]

&& A cool breeze played gently with my dark locks, twisting them around my neck and legs as lightly as a feather. My big boned frame was glistening with the cold morning dew that gathered on my legs as I walked through the grass. The tall grass only reached my knees, but the cold was pleasant. Not bad by any means. How strange of a morning it had been for me, so quite and calm my land were but still mine. There where nor horses there save for myself, they had all left though I knew not why. It was a shame, though I was not greatly attached to any of them so I was not terribly upset. My dark blue gaze was trained forward, watching the ground ahead of me. The claiming grounds were near, I could tell by the scent of all the horses near by. Nearly all of the nervous. And unless there was some mass attack planned, and these horses knew about it then this was most certainly the claiming grounds. I paused for a moment, leaning my large head down to sniff the ground. Not an easy thing to do at my height of 17 hands. Though I had always been described as flexible by my friends. I snorted, and shook my head. The grass of course was bitter and not worth eating at the moment. So instead of stalling, I made my way onward. Towards the place where I would possibly meet the next member of my herd.

&& And then as I rounded the top of a grassy knoll, my eyes caught sight of something I had never seen before. A dark bay mare was standing some ways down the hill, and was moving in the most strangest was I had ever seen. It was almost as if she was in a graceful trot, but was not moving. She remained in one place, lifting her feet up and down as if in time to a rhythm. Who was she and what was she doing? The question was burning into my mind. I would have to find out now, or it would probably bother me until I knew. I half walked, half trotted down the hill. I was loud, because I didn't want to frighten her. And heaven knows that if one were to glance my way, and see this seventeen hand, black stallion coming your way might indeed frighten a mare. I was near to her now, perhaps ten feet away when I stopped, and stood in a tall, statuesque pose with my head held high in the air. I cleared my throat loudly to announce my presence, and made a very small bow as a sign of respect. "Greetings, may I inquire as to what you are doing so gracefully?" I was complimenting her, but not without reason she looked quite beautiful doing whatever she was doing. I was sure if I tried it, I would probably trip over myself and make myself look like an utter idiot.

[l u a]

she had continued this strange, beated trot for many minutes, and her bones ached with the movement. unconcious as it was, it was not a naturally move for her body, regardless of her mind. the dust that swam around her hooves was thick, nearly hiding her slight hooves from sight.

when the stallion spoke, she shocked herself out. the pace was almost hypnotic, and she had been oblivious of his approach. pacing. thinking. pacing. thinking. her hooves, snapped from their sway and seeming confused at their purpose at all, clattered together as she stuttered back, shocked. finding firm ground beneath her feet again, she gazed at the stallion. her backwards motion had been so sudden that the dust cloud was still rising between them, but she could see enough. a thick-set, black stallion not much taller than she- but still enough to shadow her, in precence at least. she herself was one of those who found it rather easy to go invisible amongst others, her frame lean and spindled in an oddly graceful manner. he, however, was built like a boulder- all bones and muscle. she supposed his colouring could not help either. as the cloud cleared, however, she saw not what she was expecting- the eyes of a dark stag, monotone to each one she had seen before. no, his eyes held compassion, the kind of eyes you could not fake. she held herself still for a moment, before bringing one thin leg forwards and placing her hoof flat on the ground before her.

call it... a nervous habit she said smoothly. the scratch at the beginning of her sentence was clear, and she realised then that she had not used her voice since leaving her mother herd. odd. her voice contained as much suave confidence as she could muster, but still was lined by a trembled degree of fear that she couldn't shake. she did not mind this; to shake fear at this point would be the child of foolishness. and she was many things, but she was no fool.

[skiSSors]

&& I watched her for a moment longer, but she did not seem to notice me. It was almost as if she was in a trance, and I begin to wonder if she was slightly mad. I was very close to turning and finding something else to do with my time, and leaving the explanation to some crazy horse doing some crazy movement when she stopped. Her feet froze where they were, and she turned to stare at me with a fearful look in her eyes. When she saw me, she stumbled backwards, frightened. Blast. I had not meant to frighten, her, not by any means. But it seemed I had done so anyway. I took a few steps back, trying not to intimidate her. Not that she was not moving, I could see that she was nearly as tall as I was. This was unusual for me, but intriguing as well.

&& I coughed lightly, trying not to seem embarrassed at interrupting her. But I was sure I failed utterly. I nodded my head again, realizing that she had probably not heard or seen anything I had done a moment ago. And opened my mouth to repeat my question. " Terribly sorry to frighten you miss, I just wanted to inquire what you were doing so gracefully?" My voice was deep, and rough but not in a bad way more of as. Woodsy voice if there was such a thing. I tried to smile a little bit, and managed an encouraging grin. I blinked a few times, and looked away. Wondering what she was thinking right now. Probably that I was here to eat her by the look on her face.

[l u a]

she watched him with suspicion for a moment longer. her tail flattened to her rump, and she moved her hindquarters, swaying them so to be face-on to the stallion. her ears twitched position as she did so, from pointing at him to the straight-back dissaproval mechanism of most horses.

upon hearing his voice, she relaxed slightly. a few knots went from her shoulders, her ears slowing from the frantic pendulum they had been. it was a voice that hinted again that he was not simply a large, brutish dark creature. the kind of voice you could warm to. of course, voices were not enough to judge from, and she was still carefully poised and eyeing her escape routes.

"it.. i.." she almost laughed as she tried to think of a plausable answer. it was not anything. she had no name for it, she did not even notice herself doing it most of the time. it was.. well, what was it? a habit? a flaw? she mulled over her answer, but she was aware herself that there was none. keeping all external signs of cautiousness, she caught his eye again.

"i suppose i can call it little more than a dance."

[skiSSors]

&& I watched as she swung to face me, her eyes wary and cautious. I tried to relax myself, tried to make myself seemed smaller and less threatening. And I think I succeed a bit, I rested my weight on my right back hoof, bringing it up to and angle. I relaxed my muscles, and kept the smile on my face as I shook my head lightly. She was relaxing as well, perhaps my words had soothed her a bit. I was glad, I always felt uncomfortable around horses who were tense and nervous around me. I swished my tail back and forth, not for any particular reason other than just to keep movement of some sort going.

&& She seemed to struggle with words, and stuttered a bit with a half finished answer. "It...I..." she said, almost laughing. I wondered if I should laugh to, but didn't want to offend her. I didn't even really find it funny, but sometimes mares were looking for that reaction. And then she caught my eye. Strange, but I found myself unable to break her gaze though ti was awkward and uncomfortable. It seemed almost as if things had completely frozen. Just for a moment. And then she spoke again, breaking her glance and I was left staring blankly for a moment. What had that been? I had never had anything like that happen before. "i suppose i can call it little more than a dance." A dance was it? I had never seen a dance such as that before, but I wondered if I would ever see more. It had been so beautiful. "Well, it was lovely whatever it was." I said softly. I sighed, and looked away for a moment, and then turned to look at her, hoping to catch her glance again but not succeeding. " I supposed I should introduce myself, the names Skissors." I said.

[l u a]

"oh" she rasped simply, turning away from him. she was trying to look difficult, enticing, but really was trying to hide her embarrasment at her honesty. the moment she had caught his eye was a mistake. she had given herself away in a glance, regretting those few seconds the way one would forget glancing at the man who would later attack her. she felt stupid, she felt used, she felt sick.

she had let it happen.

she felt excited.

she felt all these feelings over again.

she looked out on the wasteland before her. a few crows pecked at the ground, but she knew they would die out here. it was uncomfortably hot, the ground sunbaked and dusty. nothing could survive out here long. how strange, the way love is seen as a lush landscape of thick trees and rosebuds, flowers never below the hock, waterfalls and butterflies. and here she was, searching for a mate in a land covered in nothing but brown, dried grass and the odd hungry crow. she sighed, and wheezed her name just loud enough for him to hear; "lua".

she stared at the crow a touch longer, before thinking; he was neutral. he could be anything. the romantic now, the demon in his land. but only if she submissed. she turned sharply on a spindle, staring straight into his eye again, with a different look this time. a cold look, a stern look. "i imagine you have come here searching for whores then? little mares you can plow, you can continue your blood with? is that what i have to look forward to, eh?"

he made her sick. he made her angry. but he made her excited, more than anything else ever had.

[skiSSors]

&& The small rustle of a faint heartbeat close by caught my attention momentarily as I awaited her reply, a mouse probably though I had no interest in it. The golden brown grass was knee high on me, but just barely so. It didn't so much as tickle, though I supposed that on some it would. I turned as she spoke a short work, oh. She turned her head away from me. She was unhappy about something, and I began to worry what it was. Had I unconsciously done something to upset her? I hopped not. She spoke again, and just a single word.
"Lua"
I was a goner long before she said her name of course, how silly I must seem to the reader. So foolishly falling for someone I didn't know, and may never. And I'm not the type of horse that does fall in love with just anyone. But there was something different about this mare, Lua. That excited me in ways I had never felt before.

&& "Lua..." I said it softly, quietly enough so that she wouldn't hear me. It was so easy to say, so pleasant on my lips. I was about to speak again, when suddenly she whirled around to face me, an angry passion in her eyes that startled me. She had caught my eye again, but this time it wasn't very pleasant. She met my confused glance with a cold stare.
"I imagine you have come here searching for whores then? Little mares you can plow, you can continue your blood with? Is that what I have to look forward to, eh?"
I was frozen in place, completely startled by her sudden outburst. I had never given her any reason to think these things, so clearly she had not come from some happy little herd and was used to stallion who collected mares. My muscles were tensed, and I leaned backward, almost as if trying to avoid her words. I stared at her in utter shock for a moment, my eyes wide. And then, I relaxed again, and not really sure what else to do, I took a step back and spoke.
" Is that what you think? I should hope that you would think better of me than that, I am most certainly not that type of horse. And never have been, nor ever will be."
I almost mentioned the fact that I was the Neutral king, but decided that now was not the time. It was better she didn't know. Didn't know what I was considering, didn't know that I had no queen . Or anyone for that matter. Better she didn't know how desperate I was for company.

[l u a]

she saw the way she had affected him, the way this thick stallion seemed to shake on his foundations. she was hit by a wave of guilt. he was not her father, nor her brothers or the other stallions who had taken their turn over her mother's herd. taken their turn over her mother.
it made her feel ill, the way those young stags had blundered in, sex-high and looking for thrills, thinking they were strong and smart enough to run a herd. they had been small and close, but stallions never stayed long. one would come, breed their mares and show off, and blunder when the next came along and did the same as they had. she didn't know her father, had merely heard from her mother that he was just like the others, and this was word enough. she had tried to stay where she had, in a herd run by chop-and-change, but it got too much. the only foal she had mothered had been born weak and in autumn, and, well.. snow was a harsh mistress.
she brought herself back into the present, refusing to think of the fawn. she looked at him, trying to look stern, but the mournful look at her recollection was one she couldn't shake. what was happening in her head, well, she didn't know quite how to word it.
"i.. i am sorry for my words, for judging you. the only stags i have ever come into contact with were those who hourded mares, for sordid pleasure or.. whatever it is that a young stallion lusts after. it seemed to me like such a horrific thing to do, reserved for the brash, the foul.. but no, even lights do it. darks and lights alike, irregarding their natural tendancys. mares are a vice for each stallion i have met. i have seen too many mares unable to follow those they fall for because of the whim of some lusty stag, barely a colt. if you take me from here, then take me, there is little i can do. but you must promise me.. that i am your mare, not your captive. that if the need takes me, i can leave. that you will not suffocate me.
she hoped this would not offend him. her words had gotten away with her, but this was what she knew of life. she knew the forlorn look of a mare who had fallen in love with he who was not her mate. she knew how it was to be trapped in some stretch of land, when a different location can make a difference. save a life.
oh, how she knew.

[skiSSors]

&& She was looking at me with a range of emotions now, stern, mournful. I couldn't read them all but she seemed unsure of herself now. And I was wondering if I should just leave, just forget about this strange incident altogether. But I couldn't bring myself to do that. I couldn't bring myself to turn around and just walk away. I was in to deep now.
i.. i am sorry for my words, for judging you. the only stags i have ever come into contact with were those who hourded mares, for sordid pleasure or.. whatever it is that a young stallion lusts after. it seemed to me like such a horrific thing to do, reserved for the brash, the foul.. but no, even lights do it. darks and lights alike, irregarding their natural tendancys. mares are a vice for each stallion i have met. i have seen too many mares unable to follow those they fall for because of the whim of some lusty stag, barely a colt. if you take me from here, then take me, there is little i can do. but you must promise me.. that i am your mare, not your captive. that if the need takes me, i can leave. that you will not suffocate me.
The words cut into my distraction like a knife, and I jerked my head to stare at her again. Not sure how to react to her words. I felt an odd urge to laugh yet again, and almost did this time. But not quite. It came out as sort of a strangled cough in the end. I blinked a few times, and the returned to my senses.

&& " I, I'm not honestly sure what to say to you Lua. Only the truth I suppose. I can understand what you mean, though I will not go into detail. And I can assure you that my lands are not meant as a prison. And any herd members are free to come or go as they leave, though I hardly ever offer a home in my lands unless I am confident that the horse in question will be happy there." I said is a soft, low and I hoped soothing voice. " I am as you have seen me, I would never betray anyone that I have befriended even to save my life. I am not that kind of horse." I decided to go out on a limb, I hardly knew her. But she seemed sincere and, I couldn't help feeling that I couldn't leave without her unless she wanted me to. "And so, I offer you a place in my herd Lua. And... I'm afraid I will sound like an idiot saying this, but I find myself drawn to you no matter what I do. And if... You feel the same, I would like to offer you the position of Neutral queen." There it was. She knew now who I was, the Neutral king. I hope she wouldn't hate me for it. What if she decided that because I was a king meant that she couldn't stand to be near me? I dearly hoped not.

[skiSSors]

ooc __ lua?